Pirates

I heard a joke recently that I think is worth passing on:  Two well-armed pirate ships with large crews are closing in on a ship.  The first mate alerts the captain of the ship that they are about to be attacked.  The captain immediately barks out an order to the first mate: “Bring me my red shirt!”  A fierce battle takes place and the captain and his crew defeat the attacking pirates.  The first mate then asks the captain why he insisted on wearing his red shirt.  The captain responds, “I put on my red shirt because if I would have been wounded in battle, my men would not have been able to see my blood and lose heart.”  The following week, the first mate rushes up to the captain and tells him that an entire fleet of well-armed pirate ships – a dozen in all – with large crews, is closing in on the ship.  The captain immediately shouts out an order to the first mate: “Bring me my I brown pants!”